Leonard Wolfgram: Who is a cowboy?
St. Peter was sittin’ in his office
When Red came ridin’ up one day
St. Peter says “Red what’s on your mind
Red says, “I come to draw my pay”
St Peter sets back in his chair
Said, “Ya want a career change?”
You been straw boss ever since
You been ridin’ on God’s range
So, tell me why ya don’t like yer job
So’s we can keep you satisfied
Is it hours too long, bad grub
Too tough a bronc’s to ride
Red says I’ll level with you
It’s beneath my dignity
To boss a cowboy roundup
When some shows up ridin’ ATV’s!
What is heaven comin’ to
I can’t put up with this crap
Them things ain’t got no saddle horn
An’ their wearin’ baseball caps!
Why! If heaven has a sacrilege
They’d surely qualify
These ain’t cowboy cowboy’s
Might as well ride motor bilkes!
So, St. Peter saw the problem
Heaven was beginnin’ to modernize
Them ATV’s put horses out of work
An’ cowboys’n horses have their pride
Now this kinda pride ain’t bad
When you’re proud of the job you do
We got room for all kinds in heaven
Red sat back, took out his can of chew
For instance, St. Peter said
Them gas riders chew like you
They got Wrangler W’s on their butt
An’ their wearin’ cowboy boots
That don’t make ’em horse cowboys
Till they can ride a horse nice’n easy
S’ppose their ridin’ them ATV’s
For time an’ efficiency
So, here’s what let’s do
To solve the problem you’re after
We’ll split heaven down the middle
There won’t be no common pasture
So, heaven has got a fence
Ever one lives in harmony
Cowboys ridin horses on one side
T’other baseball caps on ATV’s!
